Watch Me From Where Ever You Are
by xLollitaa
Summary: "Talking to the person you wanted to kill the most is oh-so-very… delightful. I practically laugh when I try to remember those days of you being alive." Warning: Some Hints of Yaoi
1. Chapter 1

Because Raito-sama's gift yesterday was _extremely horrible _and uninteresting – here's the _real _gift to him. I'm probably going to delete **'No Way Out' **sooner or later, unless people like it… I guess. And if you haven't passed Death Note volume VII (7) or watched beyond Death Note episode XXV (25), I suppose this fan-fiction will give out a lot of spoilers. There is some Raito x L in this too, but only a tiny, _tiny _bit. It feels a little weird not writing an M story… Here we go!

* * *

**Watch Me From Where-Ever You Are**

Dear Ryuga, Ryuzaki, L – or whoever you are –

I wanted to tell you 'thanks' for letting me kill you. I guess you lived a good and healthy (I suppose – other than the fact that you ate too much sugar) twenty-something years or so. Let's just say this – I didn't look in Rem's notebook, so I don't know your name. You wanted it to be like that, didn't you? Well, I'm granting a last request _for now_. Not that I care about your feelings and all, but I'm too caught up in Kira and L work before I can do anything else. I'll probably look into the name later when I have to chance and when I take a break from the multi-tasking. You heard me, L? Yes – I took your place – didn't you want it to be like that? Don't you remember? The time you told me that _I _was most fit to take your place when you die? Well, look at this – I've granted your wish! I'm such a nice person, aren't I, L? Well, enough with that, I have more to say. Let's get to the point: you were right, L. All, all, along.

I am Kira.

And _now _– I am also L.

All thanks to one person's death – _your _death. Isn't it so convenient?

I'm writing this letter to tell you _all _that's going on after you passed away.

Today is my birthday. Father tried to get me to celebrate by having me invite my friends to go to a restaurant or something like that. But oh, L – you know very well that I'm not interested in anything like that. So I thought to stop by the Kira Investigation Headquarters to think and relax all by _myself_. And that's when… I began to think about you. Therefore, I'm writing a letter and I have to say, this is a _great _way to spend the time on my birthday. Talking to the person you wanted to kill the most is oh-so-very… delightful.

You know about the notebook, you know about the Shinigami, therefore you know how I kill. It's too bad that you couldn't prove me guilty, but then again – I'm relieved. I'm glad you died instead of me. I'm glad you're out of my sight and forever…

Too bad you had heirs and now I'm stuck in the same hole I fell in when you were still alive.

You should have trained those kids better – they get on my nerves and they suspect me of being Kira, just like you did. M and N are pretty… unique children (uniquely annoying). But they are no competition; they are not even close to being as intelligent as you. They bore me and piss me off all the time.

Ah, L, don't you remember those days when you were alive? Wasn't it sickening to watch criminals commit crimes every day? Wasn't it _tiring_? Didn't you ever get _tired of it all! _I did – and that's why I used the Death Note. It was never for evil – but Father, the Task Force and you believed it was.

I used the Death Note for no other than _good_. I did it for _peace _on this folly world.

But no, _none _of you people thought to look beyond your stubborn ways and _see _and _realise _that Kira is justice! Kira is a saviour!

It was fun having you around, L – honestly. I really had fun with you… I even thought about keeping you alive for a split second. I thought about us working together, both you and me working for _justice_.

Why couldn't you _understand_? Why couldn't you just realise that Kira was doing the right thing? Killing criminals in order to stop crimes – to stop _evil_? No one will even _think_ of doing bad! Everyone will be scared of doing a crime… because they _know _their only fate is death. Don't you see it? Don't you see it fitting perfectly together!

You and I could have worked together in the name of justice. We could have solved more mysteries and crimes together and work as a group! Once done with the mystery, _kill _the criminal. Doesn't it work out so well!

Both you and I are the same, you know – something like mirror image. Both you and I do our jobs for a purpose – we have the same goal. To create peace and bring justice. So why didn't we work together?

Enough with that – you died; there's no going back and no regrets. It's already done.

If you are reading this letter, somehow and somewhere… and lie to yourself saying:

'_Who is this person trying to speak to me?' _and try to back away from this – let me remind you:

I am Yagami Raito – both Kira and L. Remember?

And you… I don't know who you are. Although, I usually call you by a specific name. That name was Ryuzaki. But only today I will call you L.

Can you recall those days, L…?

We had a few laughs,

We were always serious,

We fought sometimes,

We even had sex.

I practically laugh when I try to remember those days of you screaming 'Ah, ah!' and much more. I guess… That was the only time I felt like you weren't a stubborn robot-like human who doesn't know about emotions and such. Being _inside you_ has made me re-think. It made me remember that _you _are human.

But an instant after we put on our clothes… We went back to being Kira and L.

Again; we are mirrors.

We are selfish.

But I always found it very funny… How:

_We are only connected by lies._

I wasn't your first friend – I know it. You even know it. We stand as both Kira and L and only Kira and L, nothing more. We are not Raito and Ryuzaki – we couldn't ever work together or _be together_.

Although – I'm _not _giving up on my goal just for the sake of one person.

I am _not _giving up on justice.

I am Kira and I will serve as Kira.

I will also serve as God.

Let me tell you, L, I plan to reign over the world after I'm done with the killings. And then, it will become a utopia! Everyone will be happy! No one will be afraid of walking down the street alone _again_. No one will fear anyone else. It's only happiness.

If only you were here to see me become God. Then, _then _I will be able to show you how Kira was right and L was wrong.

L, you were wrong all along.

So watch me.

_Watch me!_

Watch me from where ever you are!

Heaven, Hell, or even _Mu_.

I know you're somewhere, L. I know it.

So _watch me_ become God of the New World.

With much joy,

Yagami Raito

The small letter took only about two pages or so. Without even proof-reading, Raito stood up from the chair and grabbed the two pages with his left hand, placing the pen down with his right hand and walked out of the room.

No sooner, he encountered a different room with some couches and a fire-place. When L was still alive, the Task Force rarely used the room. They only came here about once or twice – so technically, this room was a complete waste of money.

But not on this February twenty-eighth.

Raito stood there, in front of the screaming flames and clutched the papers tighter.

"This is just for you," he whispers to himself,

And throws the papers into the fire.

Where he burned away all evidence of him being Kira,

All evidence of his plans and intentions.

And burned all the inner feelings the kept inside of him.

* * *

I actually really, _really _enjoyed this fan-fiction – even though it was like… one thousand something words [I aim for three-thousand or more]. This was really fun! I was all into the Raito-mood and I felt so good about it. Oh, how I love Kira. Be prepared! There's one more chapter coming up…


	2. Chapter 2

**Watch Me From Where Ever You Are**

Yagami Raito, Kira – _who ever you are._

You're welcome – thanks to you I am now _dead_. Do you like that? I'm sure you do, _Kira. _I'm very, very sure you do. No – not even 'like' – maybe you even _love _the fact. Yes, I did live a healthy life – and I did live a good twenty-four years of living. I did hold it preciously as well… until November fifth. Do you celebrate that day every year now? I bet you do – I _know _you do. My life… it wasn't _enough _for my filling. I should have lived _longer_. I had so much in plan as well – I planned to _do _something with my life other than just sit around and stare at a computer screen. I had _more _planned. It may seem surprising to you – who was underestimating me, but I did really have other intentions. There was more to me, I do. And you want to know why? It's because I'm human, too. I have a name, which only very small amounts of people in the world know about. I have a _name_. The exact name that was written inside that horrible notebook of yours. Go ahead, read it! Oh? You don't have _time_? That's a shame – You don't even have to bother looking through hundred, thousands, millions, or _billions _of names. My name is:

_L Lawliet._

You are me now, huh? Not _me _but you stole my title just as simply you stole my life? Is that so? Then congratulations. Good job, Kira – you won, I lost.

But let me warn you: there is still a battle. There is still a war. You took one person down, and now you must take the other one. Do you know who you still haven't killed?

Justice.

Oh, today is your birthday? I'm surprised that Kira-kun didn't end up celebrating by killing criminals but instead to write a letter to me. Yes, Kira-kun, I am quite aware of your personality. I know you don't like parties with a large amount of people – and I know you like being by yourself. So why not celebrate it by _only _yourself? Why am I here? Why even _think _about me when you can be thinking about yourself? You killed me; I'm not here anymore – never to come across anyone's mind or heart. So why does it have to be _you _out of all six to seven billion people in the world? Why must it be _Kira_!

I was right all along, I knew it. I knew you were Kira and I knew you were lying this whole time. For you – what a _convenient _time for you to confess your guilt, and say it when I'm dead? Why not say it to M and N?

You won't win against them. I promise you that, they are gifted kids and you are just being selfish and the cold hearted person you are. You don't realise anything, Kira. Don't take them so lightly – you'll just lose in the end if you do. _Pride_ is one of the seven deadly sins, did you know? You, Kira, have too much pride. It sickens me sometimes – so when I think about it – how did I lose against someone who has too much pride!

It's sickening to watch _anyone _die, Kira-kun. I wonder how you could _take _and _accept _the fact that people are dying each day because of _your own hands. _The Death Note is the most evil killing weapon I've ever witnessed. Don't you remember what your father said? _'Any human who has that kind of power to kill… must be very unfortunate.' _I agree with him – but I guess you didn't. Maybe you're not even _human_. Is that why you thought you had so much fortune? The world was good enough as it was. It didn't need to be changed _at all_.

The Task Force, your Father, I, or _anyone _who disagreed with Kira was the one who was correct. We are not stubborn – we are righteous.

Kira? Thinking of _me _staying alive – oh, that sounds too unbelievable. You never wanted me alive, ever since the day Kira and L gave one another information during the trap I set with Lind L. Taylor. That day, was just day one. You wanted to kill me since day one!

Kira is not a hero; Kira will never have the chance to be one. Why don't _you _realise that you are _scaring _people – not protecting them! You are granting them death if they commit even the tiniest crime. Do you know how _terrified _people would be! What, are you going to kill a child who took a piece of candy out of a candy shop? Is that how it is – will you kill children too? Do you think they are evil for taking _one piece of candy?_

You terrify me, Kira. We could have _never _worked together. It was never meant to be, anyway. I could never dream of teaming up with Kira. I could never work with Kira and think to myself _'killing is justice.' _It was a waste of time for you to even _think _about that little imagination and plan. What? After we solve crimes together, you throw me away? After we solve crimes and no one in the world will ever commit a crime again, _what will I do?_

_What will other detectives and the police do?_

It's our _job _to catch criminals – even if that means it takes forever.

Kira is selfish and L does his actions for the sake of justice. We are not mirror image. We are only black and white. You do not want justice, Kira; you only want a world fitting of your taste.

Who are you? I don't know who you are. _Yagami Raito? _Who is that? I only know of a person named Kira. Who is Raito? Where has he gone? Why do I not remember of a person named Yagami Raito?

I am L – the original L and the _true _L, not you. I am not Ryuzaki, Ryuga, or any other pathetic name you can think of. I am L – like I said before, I am L Lawliet. So of course you know who I am. And I know who you are. You are Kira that is all. Who is Yagami Raito? I know of no such person – therefore I will call you Kira in this letter.

What days?

What laughs?

Why were we serious?

Why did we fight?

I don't recall having _sex _with a _mass murderer. _I don't scream or gasp 'ha, ha!' in your little fantasies.

I am human, not a little toy for you to have _sex _with or kill as you please.

We are _only _L and Kira. There is no one else we can be – you cannot take my title and be L and I cannot work with you and become a part of Kira.

_You _are selfish, Kira.

You're right, you weren't my first friend. Maybe a person I have come to know very much about – but you are not a friend. Kira would never have been L's friend, we all knew it.

You are not giving up _justice_? I think I'm going to laugh.

You are not giving up _evil_.

You are Kira and you will die as Kira.

There is no God.

You are no God! You will not be able to take over the entire world – and you know why? Because Justice will stop you! _Real _justice – not the fake one that you have. You intend to remove all evil from this world and only have the good? Well, I learned something when I was alive:

_There is no such thing as Good if there is no Evil._

You – Kira-kun, are not God, you are mortal. We all are mortals on this earth. We come and die.

But you are so confident that you right, you are so confident that you are God, no? Then let's see it.

Let's see you become the God you've always wanted to be.

I'll watch you –

I'll watch you, Kira.

I'll watch you from where ever I am.

Let me tell you something, Kira-kun. Enjoy the fact for now, enjoy me being dead – live your life with much suffering and much pain. Live your life with a great mass of pride. Only then, justice will get the best of you, and you will be where I am.

_Where ever I am._

L Lawliet

So, how did you little mortals like that? It was a fun piece and all… But I seriously preferred being Raito… Trying to write as L was tricky. If you're wondering: 'How did L even get the fucking letter, anyway?' or 'So is Raito going to see L's reply letter?' – That is up for you to decide. L sounds very seme in this… Ah, if you know me, L uke is the way to go! Haha, but L would have probably been angry at Raito in this letter… Well, that's just the way I see it. And this fan-fiction is done!


End file.
